A Game of COURAGE Read online

“That’s my roomie.” Doug’s pale green eyes darted toward the phone, and he grimaced. “And that pic is all over the internet.”

  Another alert rang. Mason’s grip around the thin phone became unbearably tight as he read the next message.

  Is this really her new boo?? What do you know about this?

  None of the counting or breathing techniques he had adopted over the years could stop the boiling rage that began to surface. His gaze remained glued on the damn photo, and a sudden heat rose in the back of his neck. It travelled up to his temple until he thought he would explode. The knowledge that the end of his world was reduced to internet gossip drove him over the edge.

  “Uh, Mason, can I have—”

  Before he could stop himself, Mason threw the phone across the room. It slammed against the wall and split in two.

  “—my phone back.”

  Mason cursed and ran his fingers through his hair. The short burst of anger didn’t help lessen his outrage any.

  Doug sighed and went to pick up what was left of the broken phone. “Never mind. I guess I didn’t need a phone.”

  Mason ran his fingers through his hair again. “Sorry. Get yourself a new one. Charge it to my account.”

  “Oh, you bet I will,” Doug muttered. He straightened and turned back to face him. “About what’s been posted…?”

  Mason shut his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Doug, do me a favor.”

  “Yeah?”

  “Get the hell out.”

  Doug quietly backed out of the office. Mason waited until the door shut before he sank into the seat behind his desk. He tried to rein in his unruly temper so he could think clearly. He needed to get himself under control if he was going to confront his wife and figure out what the hell was going on.

  None of this made sense. They had their problems, sure. What marriage didn’t? But the woman he had married eight years ago wouldn’t just break up their family.

  She wouldn’t.

  Mason glanced over at the family photo that hung on his wall. It felt like another lifetime ago. They had taken it three years ago, right before the Cajun Rage had started its first season. He remembered this particular photo had been one of the few taken at the start of their shoot. They had been trying to get their then five-year-old son and eighteen-month-old daughter to sit still long enough for the photo. The photographer had decided to continue shooting while they had been trying to wrangle a smile from Jeremy and keep Madison from crawling out of the shot.

  After a series of nice, professionally posed shots, it was this silly candid photo that Jules had selected to have framed for his new office.

  Something to look at whenever you forget to smile, she had said.

  Mason fixed his gaze on his wife in the photo, her honey brown skin accentuating the golden flecks in her striking almond-slanted eyes. The ripples of her dark stylishly curled hair hung pass her shoulders and framed her slender face. She was a beauty for sure, but she was so much more than that. She was loving, selfless, and as fierce as she was gentle. Especially when it came to the people she loved or the things she cared about.

  That’s why none of this made sense to him. The woman he married wouldn’t breakup their family, no matter how tough things got.

  He continued to stare at the photo. Instead of the warm feelings he had always gotten from looking at the photo, a slow panic and sense of dread began to fill him. He couldn’t lose his family.

  He wouldn’t.

  Pushing up to his feet, Mason grabbed his keys and rushed out of the door.

  2

  “Linda, how did this happen? This is not what I wanted.”

  Juliette Courage paced around her living room, trying her best not to completely lose her cool with her lawyer.

  “This didn’t come from my office, Jules. I can assure you,” Linda Greisen said. “Some file clerk must have recognized your names. This sort of stuff is not very uncommon, and it’s no big deal, really.”

  “Yes, it is! The media’s making up all kinds of lies about us. About me.”

  Jules glanced back at the muted television screen. The mockery someone had made of their wedding photo stirred another wave of nausea through her. It was bad enough her private life was being plastered across the local news—having the most painful decision of her life being made fun of was beyond hurtful.

  “I’m sorry about that, but you know how the media is. They’ll gobble up anything that’s hot right now, and right now, your husband is a local celebrity.”

  “I don’t care. You assured me this would go quickly and quietly. You need to fix this!”

  Linda sighed. “I’ll see what I can do, but honestly, there isn’t much. It’s all just bad timing and exactly the kind of gossip the media loves to latch on to. Just give it some time and it’ll be old news soon.”

  But Jules didn’t have time.

  The distinct sound of the front door slamming shut jolted her. She whirled around as Mason’s heavy footsteps snapped against the tile floors.

  “Linda, I’ll call you later.”

  “All right, but I—”

  Jules hung up and waited as Mason made his way to the sitting room. She mentally braced herself for his anger, which she knew would be there, even if he tried to hide it. Mason didn’t like surprises, and this was certainly not how she had wanted him to find out.

  Jules folded her hands in front of her, her heart thumping in her chest as she waited. Her anticipation wrestled with her anxiety. In that moment, she was acutely aware of every tremor running down her arms, every breath that escaped her constricted lungs. She felt as she was preparing herself for battle. In this case, she was.

  Mason strode into the spacious room then stopped. His piercing gaze locked on her, and behind his marine-blue eyes were a steely calm she’d seen before. Even the silk strands of his dark brown hair were neatly in place, highlighting the coolness of his composed demeanor. He didn’t fool her for a second as he continued to regard her for what seemed like an eternity until she couldn’t stand the tension any longer.

  “Mason, this is not how I wanted you to find out.”

  The muscles in his jaw flexed. “How exactly did you want to tell me you were going to break up our family?”

  Jules winced inwardly. “That’s not what I wanted either.”

  Yet that’s exactly what she was doing…

  “Then what do you want, Jules?”

  He propped himself on the armrest of the sofa and folded his arms across his chest. His biceps bulged beneath his suit, creating a noticeable outline and she couldn’t help but remember the nights when those arms had curved around her waist and held her close. She missed those nights.

  “You’ve got my full attention now. Isn’t that what your little stunt was about?”

  Jules tightened her lips together at his condescending remark. Did he really think she would file for divorce just to get him to pay attention to her? She hated that he would even think that.

  Even more than that, she hated that he could be right.

  Folding her arms under her breasts, she regarded him just as coolly. “Mason, I didn’t do this to get your attention, though it’s nice to see that you remember you have a wife and family at home.”

  His glare was laser sharp. He was furious.

  “If you didn’t do this to break up our family, if you didn’t do it to grab my attention, then what the hell is this all about? What anniversary or birthday did I miss this time that has you so pissed at me? What the hell did I do that you’d go this far to hurt me? Tell me.”

  She stared at him closely, realizing his stoic rigidity wasn’t because he was trying to keep his temper in check but because he was hurting.

  A lump formed in her throat, and Jules glanced away. She didn’t want to hurt him. She just wanted them to be like they once were, before he had taken on the coaching position with the Cajun Rage and allowed hockey to dominate his life in a way it hadn’t before. They had drifted further apart this past
year, and no amount of personal assistants or aides or arguments could change the fact that he had chosen what his priority would be.

  “I’m not trying to hurt you, Mason,” she murmured. She glanced down at her hands, and her eyes fell to the engagement ring and wedding band that had been around her finger for nearly ten years. “I’m just tired of having this argument with you. It’s clear you can’t be a husband and father to us and be a coach to your players.”

  “What are you talking about? When haven’t I been there for you and the kids?”

  “It’s the day-to-day. We almost never see you anymore, and every year it gets worse. You said this coaching position wouldn’t change how things were, but we spend more time video-chatting with you than anything. Even on the weekends, you’re not around.”

  He ran a hand across the back of his neck. “Okay, maybe these past few weeks have been a challenge, but that’s because we were in the middle of a championship series. And we won. Now I’ve been promoted to head coach. I know you’ve never cared for hockey, but I hoped you would be a little excited about that.”

  She scoffed. She was quite the opposite. “Mason, we hardly saw you when you were just assisting. Now you’re going to be head coach, and you expect me to be happy about that? Why?”

  “Because you’re my wife and this is a big moment for me. For our family. And in case you’ve forgotten, this job is how we’re able to live in this neighborhood, in this big house, and send our kids to the best schools.”

  Jules balled her hands into fists at her sides, her temper mounting. “In case you’ve forgotten, Mason, I’m not a trophy wife. I didn’t marry you for your money, or to live in a big house in a fancy neighborhood. I would be content with half of this if that meant having you around more. I’m thrilled you’re getting what you want out of your career. Just don’t expect me to smile about it when I also see what it’s doing to our family. It’s too damn depressing.”

  He regarded her closely. “Have I made you that unhappy?”

  Jules sighed and shut her eyes for a moment. How was she supposed to hold on to her resolve when he looked at her like that?

  “Mason, I’m happy that you’re happy with your career. I agreed to move away from my family and friends so that we could have this opportunity. But Jeremy and Madison are getting older, and the way things are between us… It’s not fair to them, and I’m getting tired of making excuses for you.”

  “So you’d rather break up our family? You’re not even going to give me a chance to fix it?”

  She sighed. “Our kids are growing up before my eyes, Mason. Yet every time I look around, you’re nowhere in sight. They miss you, and I…”

  I just want my husband back.

  “Getting a divorce isn’t going to make things better,” Mason said tightly. “You know that. Unless you’re not interested in making things better. Is there something you’re not telling me?”

  Jules back drew up at the suggestion in his tone. It was also in his shrewd gaze—his assumption that this had more to do with someone else than the fact that he had let his work turn him into a neglectful husband and a distracted father.

  “I hope you’re not accusing me of seeing someone,” she snapped.

  “Are you?” His even tone couldn’t mask the flinty anger in his gaze.

  “No.” She narrowed her eyes at him. “The fact that you would even think that shows just how little you know about what’s going on in this house.”

  He pushed away from the sofa and advanced toward her. It was only when he got this close that she was reminded of how tall he was. Even at five-eight, she had to stare up at his lean yet athletic six-five frame.

  “Then enlighten me. Who’s the guy you were caught having dinner with?”

  “Dinner?” She racked her brain at who he could possibly by talking about. She hadn’t been out with anyone in—

  Oh, no.

  He couldn’t possibly know about that. Could he?

  “Don’t lie to me, Jules, because pretty soon all of New Orleans will be talking about the mystery man who was out to dinner with my wife.”

  Jules suppressed the guilt that threatened to surface. She had done nothing wrong that night, and she wouldn’t let him make her feel like she had. Luckily, she didn’t have to defend herself or go into any further explanation.

  They were interrupted by small feet running down the hall, the light slaps of their daughter’s sandals getting louder as she barreled toward them.

  “Daddy!”

  Mason turned away from Jules and caught their daughter as she flung herself into his arms. He tossed her up, and Jules couldn’t help smiling at her daughter’s squeals of delight.

  “How’s my little princess?” Mason asked as he settled her against his shoulder.

  Madison blew out a dramatic breath. “Daddy, I’m not a princess anymore.”

  “You’re not?”

  “Nooo. I’m a queen. Like Mommy.”

  Mason glanced at her, his brows raised, and Jules shrugged, not bothering to go into an explanation of their overly imaginative four-year-old’s current phase of believing she was destined to be a queen because her mommy had won a beauty contest several years ago.

  Besides, Jules was certain her daughter’s attention would be fixated on something new next week.

  “Then should I call you Queen Madison?” Mason asked. “Or Queenie for short?”

  Madison giggled. “I like Queenie.”

  “I like it too,” Carrie Joseph said as she made her way into the room, with Jeremy following behind her. Their part-time nanny was a dream to have. Not only did she work well with their son and his autism, Jeremy also took to her.

  “How was school today, Jeremy?”

  Jeremy didn’t respond to Mason. Instead, his gaze remained glued to his tablet as he made his way to the sofa and sat down.

  “He hasn’t been feeling very talkative today,” Carrie said.

  “What’s he watching?” Jules asked her.

  “A rerun of that panda cartoon he loves.”

  Jules nodded, familiar with her son’s favorite cartoon. They had been managing their son’s autism since he had been diagnosed at the age of two. There was something about the kung-fu-fighting panda that helped him self-regulate his emotions during car rides. But if she let him, he would fixate on his tablet and never acknowledge them.

  “Jeremy, Daddy asked you a question. How was school today?”

  “Leave it,” Mason muttered.

  “His speech therapist says we need to encourage him to speak more at home, even when he’s not feeling up to it.”

  “If he doesn’t want to speak right now, Jules, don’t force him.”

  She pressed her lips together, a bit annoyed by his attitude toward their son’s communication development. While she wanted to encourage their son to express himself more, Mason was content to let him do as he pleased. Not wanting to argue with him in front of their kids, Jules let the matter drop.

  “I’m starting school too, Daddy.”

  “I’ve heard,” Mason said, giving their daughter the attention she clearly wanted. “You’re a big girl now.”

  “When I get big like you, can I play hockey too?”

  “Why not? Maybe you can even coach too. You can have everyone calling you Coach Queen.”

  Madison giggled. “Queenie Coach!”

  He chuckled. “Even better.”

  As much as Jules hated to end their moment of bonding, she knew their daughter would talk Mason’s ear off if he let her. And there was still so much that had been left unsaid between them.

  “Carrie, would you take the kids up to their rooms for a bit?”

  “Sure,” Carrie said, glancing from Jules to Mason. She reached for Madison, but their daughter instantly wrapped her tiny arms around Mason’s neck.

  “But Mommy, I wanna tell Daddy about my new school.”

  “You can tell me all about it later, sweetie.”

  She pouted. “But Daddy…�
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  Mason tickled her until she squealed with laughter and loosened her hold around him. Carrie scooped her up in her arms, continuing the tickling as she called to Jeremy.

  “Jeremy, can I get a hug before you go?” Mason asked.

  Their son came back to stand in front of Mason. He stood still as Mason wrapped an arm around his slender shoulders and pulled him into a hug.

  “Thanks, buddy.”

  Jeremy pulled out of the embrace and followed Carrie and Madison out of the room. When Jules was certain they were out of earshot, she turned back to Mason. The bitter anger that had been etched across his face was now wiped away. Their children had that effect on him. With them, he had never lost his patience or temper.

  No matter what she felt about him or their marriage, Mason was an incredible father—when he was around.

  “I don’t want to lose my kids, Jules.”

  She sighed. “You’re not losing them, Mason.”

  He walked over to her and took her hand in his. “I don’t want to lose you, either.”

  Jules let her gaze drop to his chest. The torment in his eyes was too distracting. None of it was easy for her, and she didn’t want to have to make this decision. But she knew the sooner she ripped off the bandage, the sooner she could tend to her wounded heart and try to find a way for it to heal.

  “Mason, this is hard for me too, but—”

  “It doesn’t have to be. We can make this work. Just tell me what you want me to do, and I’ll do it.”

  She continued to stare at his chest, lost. She didn’t have a checklist for him to follow. What she wanted—no, needed—from him went far deeper than that. But before she could find the words, his next remark caused her heart to flip then plummet.

  “You still love me, Jules. Don’t you?”

  She brought her eyes up to him then, taken aback by the question. Did she still love him? She couldn’t deny it, so she didn’t. She also knew he could see the answer in her eyes, and she didn’t bother hiding it.

  “I still love you, Jules. I’ll do whatever it takes to make our marriage work.”

  “Anything?”

  She studied him closely, wondering just how willing he was to stand by his word. During one of their lowest moments, she had made a suggestion that would help repair their marriage, but he had swiftly shut it down.